Tuesday 7 January 2014

Hunting the Priest Killer - The Aftermath

It turns out that Fred being stupid made me angrier than even Harry expected.

Fred is insisting that I was worried because he was in danger and so was driven to desperate action. I deny this most earnestly since 1) Fred is a moron and 2) He's just plain wrong.

Harry has informed me that our pitch battle against the forces of the underworld i.e. Bill Sykes, was more of a fairly one-sided barrage from me that caused Sykes and the Snake Devils to hide under barrels and tables until the reinforcements arrived...and when I say reinforcements I mean the police arrived to arrest them.

Harry had called them when I started indiscriminately shooting everything that moved, thinking that having back up might be necessary...go figure!

Fred escaped the hail of bullets, though not because I was intentionally not aiming for him. He was rather worse for wear, some minor internal injuries and a concussion that granted was not helped when he was hit round the head with my hand clutching a heavy pistol.

But this is all slightly ahead of where we should be, after all, the last I told of this little misadventure, Harry, Fred and I were all tied to chairs in a domestic setting.

From what Harry relates, the chair I was sitting on I splintered into kindling by leaping and thrashing about in my bonds like I was some form of demented shark crossed with a rabid dog. From this point on I felt that most of his retelling was over-exaggerated so in the interest of preserving my integrity and reputation for only reporting the absolute honest truth, I hand you over to Harry Lee (I apologize for my poor judgement in this matter)

Nicolette Mace: the Raven Siren is not a creature that most men want to cage. There is a small number of people who think that's a good idea, but they tend to be the owners of business, cars, hospitals and cities that want to stem the wide spread destruction that follows in her path.

Bill Sykes had just achieved his ambition of leading the Snake Devils gang, some considered them to be the roughest and toughest hombres the city has ever seen, I think the Devil's Hole Gang were more threatening.

Siren and I were tied to chairs in the dining room. There was a lamp in the corner casting long shadows and a cloud of dense cigarette smoke settled at my eye level. Sykes was making the biggest mistake any man can make - he was daring the wrath and scorn of a woman who is bordering on being a psychopath at the best of times. 

"Oh and that precious priest, it was a pleasure to kill him, like it will be your lover boy in the kitchen." 

I'm not sure which part of his statement made her more angrier, whether it was the admission of guilt or if Sykes referring to Fred as Siren's lover. It was probably something like a fifty fifty split, but just one of those in a statement would have been enough to make her lose it. 

She started to strain and thrash as though she was possessed and someone was trying to exorcism demons. The next thing I knew was the chair she was tied to splinted to well splinters. Three gang members tried to rush her but found themselves thrown through the wall and windows. Sykes fled to the kitchen to try and find a shield as Siren picked up some errant guns. For some reason she cut me loose and I thought it wise to phone the station for back-up, after all I was not about to try and calm her down on my own.

She started firing at everything in sight, so I hide behind the sofa as she pelted the windows, walls, furniture and everything but Fred with gunfire.

Sykes ended up surrendering and was arrested the moment that the police cars turned up on the scene and had wrestled the guns from Siren's hands.

Fred made some stupid comment about knowing that she cared and got belted round the head with her fist and 9mm.

There's not much I can say about Siren that she wouldn't threaten to shoot me for, but I can say this - she is nothing but consistent in being so terrifying when defending Fred and adamant that she'd be better off with him dead - women, go figure!

Looking for the perfect present for Raven Siren fans? Look no further! The Nicolette Mace books are now available in digital and paperback from Barnes and Noble.

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